Make Space for Intuition
Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash
I am a life-long skeptic. My typical pattern is to listen and value my intellect and reason above all else. For decades, I would dismiss anything that didn’t follow rational thinking as being too “woo-woo.” But I was in a conundrum. Because, as a designer, I also know the value of my gut. There’s sometimes decisions or designs that I can’t rationally explain why and yet I intuitively know will work. I’ve written about how to follow your curiosity and express intuition at work. Deep down, I’ve always known that there was a subconscious mind that helps with creativity. It’s the same reason why sometimes we get our best breakthrough ideas in the shower or when taking a walk out in nature. Now I realize that the best approach is to treat all these factors—intellect, reason, intuition, emotions, and feelings—as inputs and perspectives into decision-making.
Listen to How You Feel
I was recently working with a client on finding a new job. Throughout the interview process, we’d shared a google sheet with clear criteria for what mattered to her—the company’s culture and philosophy, the type of work they focused on, the people she’d work with, her title and its equivalent responsibilities, and the financial compensation. We’d been evaluating each company she talked to against these criteria, and one company, we’ll call them company A, was her top choice. She eventually got two offers, one from A and one from company B. Both were solid offers and she would have been excited to work at either place. A was the clear front-runner based on the criteria and she was prepared to accept that offer. She went to dinner with the partners, and called me the next day to share:
“I didn’t feel good about them. Something was off. I’m not sure what.”
She had follow up meetings with more people at company A, and that uneasy feeling continued. In the end, she spent some time talking with the people at company B, felt reassured by her interactions with them, and ended up taking the offer with company B.
It’s important to listen to how you feel. My client and I discussed the rational underpinnings behind the feelings as well, but that was after the fact. The “something was off” feeling was the first indicator that she needed to dig deeper beyond the obvious decision and listen to how she was feeling.
You Can Change Your Mind
A former client taught me that you can change your mind. She was a deeply intuitive leader and worked for a large technology company. She was in-touch with what really mattered to her—she wanted to start her own business in a deeply-meaningful space to her. But she wasn’t ready to make a move yet. She was earning a lot of money in the corporate world. As we worked together, she explored more deeply into her possible futures. She could go to business school and get an MBA that would give her more connections and business skills. She could explore paths to find cofounders. She could simply quit her job and get started with her venture.
What helped her explore the right path for her intuitive leadership was to simply pick a direction and move forward with it for some weeks or months. She would talk to advisors and ask them about the value of an MBA. Then she would switch and would talk to investors about her idea.
What helped her follow her intuitive leadership was telling herself that she was moving on the path for one possible future (of many) and “You can always change your mind.”
The path of logic and reason argues for us to commit to a single focused direction and keep moving with it. Yes, when more data comes in, or when there’s a logical reason to do so, we can switch directions, but otherwise, it’s important for us to focus and not get distracted from the plan.
The path of intuition says that it’s OK to change your mind. There doesn’t have to be a reason other than “Today, I feel differently. This is what I want right now.”
Practice the Muscle of Intuition
As leaders in tech, whether in the corporate world or startups, we’re used to being highly rational and continuing to follow our milestones, roadmap, and todo lists to achieve success in the world. I’m sharing another way—the path of intuition—which needs a little more practice because it’s an underused muscle for many of us.
When you’re next faced with a decision, ask yourself three questions:
What does my head say about this decision?
What does my heart say?
What does my gut say?
For my client who was deciding between company A and B, the answers might have been:
My head says to go with company A. We’ve laid out all the criteria and A scores the highest in all the things that matter to me.
My heart says that I don’t want to work with these people. Somehow, I don’t feel valued there.
My gut clenches. Something is off.
The important thing is to ask the questions of your head/heart/gut, and listen to the answers. Truly hear what matters. Know that you don’t have to choose or decide based on your intuition. You simply want to practice the underused muscle with a sense of curiosity to see what you can learn.
Bottom Line
I’ve spent decades of my life being driven by logic and reason, and once I’ve made space for intuition, it’s felt like my decision-making skills have become amplified. Making space for intuition provides additional perspective and nuance to understand what really matters. You can listen to how you feel, practice the muscle of intuition, and ultimately know that you can change your mind.
I’m offering a women’s leadership retreat, The Heroine’s Journey in September 2021, that combines the practical skills of leadership—finding clarity, working through self-critical voices, building trusted relationships—with the intuitive space for feminine leadership, magic and adventure. If you’d like to make space for your intuition you can learn more and apply to attend.